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Whenever an opponent sacrifices a permanent or discards a permanent card, you get to put it onto the battlefield under your control

It's more expensive and harder to move around than the other options mentioned, but boy does it hit like a truck

This is also huge for cards that say whenever you gain life, your opponents lose that amount of life: Enduring Tenacity, Sanguine Bond, Vito, Thorn of the Dusk Rose

After all, we keep finding women bending down near lakes

The shield of unimpeachable purity is as strong as any wrought on the anvil

Even before it was previewed, designer Gavin Verhey teased that it might need to be banned, due to qualities it shares with other previously problematic common cards, which already appear on the Pauper MTG banlist